Sooner or later, almost every family deals with the regret of missing out on stories they wish they’d asked for while they had the chance. I spoke with the L3 Foundation about preventing those missed opportunities.
The Memories That Documents Can’t Capture
Our conversation was about memoir, but not in the formal, “go write a big book” sense. I talked about a much more useful goal: helping families save the memories, values, photos, recipes, letters, and life lessons that can disappear if no one makes time to gather them.
While estate plans and legal documents matter, they won’t tell your grandchildren what your first house felt like, how your parents raised you, why your family moved, what your work taught you, or what you hope your family carries forward.
Those stories have to come straight from you.
Start with One Story, Photo, or Question
My advice is simple: Don’t wait until the project feels fully planned. Start with one piece.
Record a memory on your phone. Answer one prompt from a guided journal. Gather old photos in one place. Write down the story behind a family recipe. Ask your children what they’ve always wanted to know, or ask your parents what life looked like before you came along.
A family history doesn’t have to cover everything. In fact, it probably shouldn’t. Memoirs work best when they save the moments people return to: the stories told around the dinner table, the risks that changed a life, the values that shaped a family, and the details future generations won’t be able to guess. Those pieces of history, ultimately, are what matter most.
Perfection isn’t feasible or even desirable. People often get stuck waiting for every tiny detail to line up, but I advise clients to aim for a finished version, not a flawless one.
You can always add more later.
Leaving More Than Paperwork Behind
Whereas legal wills concern wealth and property, ethical wills are personal letters or documents meant to pass down values, blessings, memories, and messages.
During our talk, one participant shared that he wrote love letters to each family member as part of his own ethical will, and it was the most moving idea of the whole conversation: Don’t just leave people documents or assets. Leave them your voice.
If you’ve ever thought, “I wish I knew more about my parents,” or “Someone should really write this down,” then this discussion is for you.
At its core, my message is a simple nudge: Someone should write that down, and it doesn’t have to be perfect to matter.
You can listen to my full conversation with L3 here.
If your family has stories worth preserving but you’re unsure how to turn them into a book, MemoirGhostwriting.com can help you gather those memories and create a memoir your family can keep for generations.
A Message from Our Founder
MemoirGhostwriting.com helps professionals become known leaders in their field through bestselling books—and helps families preserve life stories through beautifully crafted private memoirs. Whether the goal is to win more business, raise speaking fees, or create a lasting legacy, we handle the entire process end-to-end.
Reply to this email with any publishing or writing questions. My team and I would love to help.